Some people take advantage of the New Year to create “resolutions”, but honestly it is a lie that you are telling yourself. How many years have you PROMISED to eat better, exercise, pay off your debt….to return to your ugly habits by mid February. Forget about unrealistic standards that you set for yourself. I can speak first hand, that it will never work. If you REALLY want to see and make a difference in your life, you will take it more seriously. Spend time in true investments…in yourself. If you don’t have the patience, interest or diligence,then you may not be ready for personal growth. Resolutions are only as good as the person truly committed to making change. Very often, I like to brainstorm on how I can continue to make my life happy and fulfilled. What I realized is nothing falls in your lap; it take true hard work and determination. I have to admit, I sometimes can get lazy and fall short of my talents. But the only person that is suffering from that flaw is myself. Today, I decided to broaden my growing empire and focus on how I can become a better me. I don’t like to dwell on the past; thinking about what I could’ve, should’ve or would’ve done with my life. A better option, is to move forward and know that it is never too late to be happy while on this Earth.
I mentioned “investments” earlier. Not regarding stock, bond and money market accounts, but something very similar. The theory is to put money in something to get more money out of it in return. The concept can be applied to your life and living. Don’t look at it as waste. A brand new shiny Birkin bag work $50k may be considered an investment to some. But for others, it is not as realistic. To be practical, start out small; take classes on how to write a book; go back to school to learn something of interest, start a business, write a blog, become a mentor to a youth, patent an invention, volunteer you time at a community project that is important to you. All these are examples of investments that can allow you achieve personal greatness. If you don’t know where to begin, there are tools available to help you get started. I personally know organizers and Life coaches who are more than willing to give a hand to bettering your future.
I am at a step, in my personal journey, to share without asking for anything in return. My fulfillment is knowing that someone else took a step to living a life free of negative thoughts and actions, dangerous habits and thoughtless choices. I declare today is the first day of the rest of your life.
- What Are My Barriers to Personal Growth and Development? (youuniversityonline.com)
- Introduction to personal growth (wiseslacker.com)
- Do Your Work (readingsbylisa.wordpress.com)
- Book Talk: A Summary and Review of The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth by John C. Maxwell (quazen.com)
Choice-noun.. /CHois-/an act of selecting or making a decision when faced with two or more possibilities.
Daily, people have to make tough decisions that will dictate the rest of their day; and in some cases, the rest of their life. Choice. Many, rely on their “gut instincts” to come up with a decision. You often hear people say “I hope you make the right choice.” Who is to say what is the right… choice. That’s how I felt when I had my career in Child Welfare. I held different job titles in the occupation, but the denominator in my daily tasks were: choice.
My longest title I held in child welfare was in Adoption. If you like children, I do not suggest this career choice for you: I earned a living following Federal and State rules; under the microscope of Administration; sometimes looking out for the best interest of the Agency as well as the child; dealing with uptight attorneys who often wanted to set a precedent with their political views at the wrong time; and the toughest of all, retaining dignity and self-respect as you face scrutiny, ridicule and resentment from family members, the media, Judges and the Community. Choice. Instead of being the Case Manager, I should of been called the Choice Manager. My role was simple, yet complicated: ensure that a child that is in foster care is adopted to a suitable family. That was the simple part. It became complicated when you as the Choice Manager, had to use your professional opinion to achieve the goal. Remaining objective often was challenging. As I think about it, now that I stepped down from that role, I can see a different side; from subjective end. I recently watched the dramatic movie Losing Isaiah which tells the story about a crack-addicted african-american child who was illegally adopted by an affluent upper class caucasian family. The birth mother did not formally sign over her parental rights, and the case was taken to trial. The Judge made the decision to return the child to the natural mother; deeming that children should have the chance to be raised by their birth parents/family members. Of course race, class and economic status were the factors that each party argued. What it the right choice? I’ve watched that movie dozens of times. However, since I no longer hold that position of constantly watching with child welfare eyes, I was able to look at the movie with a different pair of glasses. The numbness that I have been accustomed to for almost a decade immediately crumbled. Tears flowed with ease as I watched both families struggle to love a child. I was finally allowed to feel; and it was a bittersweet moment. Then I started thinking about all the choices I had to make in my career. I personally choose specific families to be forever-parents to foster children. I interviewed them face-to-face, ask them personal questions, as if they were applying for a bank loan to buy a home. I saw the fear in their eyes, I noticed the perfect fronts they put on for me. They wanted to be the chosen one. I had to make the right choice. When a mother and father conceive a child, that child doesn’t get to choose their parents. Those parents don’t get to choose their offspring. But I as Choice Manager, played an instrumental role in creating family units. For the rest of their lives, their own choices would be stemmed from the foundation of MY choice. When I received the heart felt cards stating how much of an impact I had on their family after a successful adoption, I would smile at the jester and move on. Never would I treat it as nothing important, but unfortunately my heart would not allow me to feel the gratitude. Today, while having a moment of refection of the lives I’ve changes, I can say that I have made some of the most critical and live-changing choices of my life. I still humble myself when I say that I created these life-changing choices. I don’t want to take the credit of a system that often times works. But I will say that it has been a true blessing to know that the possibilities that I was faced with professionally, were successful to someone personally.
I remember watching an episode of “Sex and the City” when Carrie was unfortunately looking for another apartment. I don’t think anybody, is thrilled to look for a new place to live; be it a forceful situation or by choice. ITS DREADFUL. In going back to Carrie’s situation, her first priority was not ensuring she was in a safe neighborhood, but making sure she had enough room for her precious footwear. When she realized that it was slim-pickings of closet space even in the Upper East Side, slight depression set in. At this moment, I can’t pride myself by saying I own upscale designer shoes such as Manolo Blaniks, Prada, Gucci or even a fine pair of Giuseppe Zanotti’s but I can relate to the Fashionista character, and any women who just simply adores good shoes: when there is no space for them, there must be hell to pay. I knew moving into an NYC apartment that I would have to compromise with space and be more organized with my many clothes. However, when I saw where I was forced to put my BINS of shoes, I nearly whelped. When relocating, I had to swallow my pride and give, sell, beg, plead and grovel to people to take my belongings off my hands, but I wasn’t about to part with my personal items, such as my jewelry and shoes. I was assured that there would be arrangements made for my treasures possessions. I will be patient. I envision that one day I will have a replica of the elaborate closet that superstar diva Mariah Carey owns. I say closet loosely because in reality her closet take up a whole floor of an apartment building!! In the meantime, I will get acclimated with the resources that are given to me. I will soon give my shoes a proper home. 🙂